Thursday, September 17, 2009

Quoting a Quoter

I skimmed through my Google Reader this morning and this post was sitting amongst over 500 that were waiting to be read - er, more likely, deleted.

homeschool vs. public school.

Right off the bat I can see that the author is contentious. One doesn't compare two options unless they are weighing them.

The point of the article she quotes is that sending children to public school is beneficial, and this original author argues his point well. Kind of. I mean, I don't agree with what he has to say, but I see where he's coming from and I can respect his opinion.

Here's what irks me. It's not that these two bloggers are anti-homeschooling (I don't think either one is vehemently opposed or anything - they have simply decided it's not what's best for their family) but that there has to be a comparison, a criticism, a justification - at all. It makes me wonder, though: people who send their children to public school, do you regularly feel criticized for it by homeschoolers?

Most of my friends' kids are in a traditional school setting, whether private or public school. I can't think of a single friend that I think is making the wrong choice. I know that they have weighed their options. They have prayed and discussed and chosen to school in a certain way. And I don't stand in judgment even a tiny bit. I don't want anyone judging my decisions and I don't have a right to judge theirs either.

It's crazy and sad that we cannot stand together as a Christian community and support one another. Love one another. Encourage one another. There is so much tearing down that moms and dads are left feeling isolated and alone and criticized. Can't we just stop this and help each other to be better parents??


  1. I'm not sure if "getting along" is ever going to happen. There is always someone willing to attack our choices regardless of what we do. I can only assume it is because it ranks right up there with the working mom v. SAHM mom issue. Passion & drama going hand in hand.

    I personally don't talk about it. It's a bomb waiting to go off, but my personal opinion about it is this... If a parent has truly thought through their choice, then I don't care what they do. It's their choice. However, I'd hate to think that any parent chose an educational option by default. So weigh the cost, think it through, and then be confident in your choice (ps, cs, hs).

    I've gotten hassled for every choice I've ever made. Good thing I knew why I was doing what I was doing or I might get a complex. ;-)

  2. My first thought upon reading her post today? That she obviously isn't secure in her decision. She totally would benefit if you bring this stuff up to her.

  3. Thank you Em! This is what I've been thinking for a long time on a variety of topics, not just homeschooling.

    If you choose not to breastfeed you are criticized. If you choose to wean at a certain point you are criticized. If you go "too long" you are criticized.

    If you feed your kid jar food you are criticized. If you make your own you are criticized.

    If you involve your kids in a "too many" many activities and push them to do their best in them, you are criticized. If you don't put them in any activities, or enough you are criticized for not giving them enough opportunities.

    If you let your baby cry it out you are criticized. If you don't, you are criticized.

    And on and on. I think parents spend far too much time worrying about and pointing fingers at what other parents and kids are doing instead of focusing on their own family.

  4. Goodness me oh my. I never in a million years thought that schooling would be such a HUGE area of contention. It's crazy. And I thought once I got married I would live happily ever after...heehee.

    But Daisy is right...make your choice...then be confident and stick to your guns. Otherwise you will be eaten alive. So sad, but true. And mainly, above all, do what God calls you to do. In the end, when I am standing before my Holy, Righteous, Eyes-like-Blazing-Fire God, I will most certainly NOT care about what any person on earth thinks.

    God Bless!

  5. having 2 in school and 2 homeschooled, i get it both ways! right now, my sophomore wants to be homeschooled so she can graduate early. talk about the flack i've gotten over that one. i actually had a mom tell me that there will be boys at BC too (where she'll finish high school while getting college credit). that wasn't even a concern in high school. her teachers were good, and one or two even great, but she decided it was a waste of time. at 14, she has peace of mind to make tough decisions. i'm so thankful i had her at home for 13 years for her to gain the confidence in Christ to do so.

    My younger children will probably stay home through high school and graduate from BC with an AA by 18. Not to rush them, but because it's easy to do so when you homeschool. i don't criticize people for public education, but i do hope everyone sees all the options available to your children no matter the method of schooling. (yes, you can get high school and credit for the same class-homeschooling or not!) i hate the 'follow blindly' mentality. what is good for one, is not always good for another. (my eldest is graduating from EB this year and did just fine through high school). parents must pray to find what to do with their children and follow Him in those decisions.

    After all, we are accountable to God and not man (or other mothers, or educators, or educated idiots).

  6. I am trying to be confident in my decision. Actually at the moment I am just trying to make a decision. I need to get my thoughts together and email you some more questions! You've been so helpful, THANKS!

  7. First off, Bravo Lisa (above). I totally agree.

    Second, in answer to your question in the blog, no I don't feel condemned or like anyone questions my choice. I see what you mean though -- the way homeschoolers have to constantly justify & defend their choice to HS. Crazy! Luckily, in my extended family, there is a good mix of HS & traditional schoolers, so we fit just fine w/ our family.