Sunday, June 07, 2009

We are One

Caris and I have been talking about getting her ears pierced. She's asked the same questions over and over: how much will it hurt? Will it be this fast? (clink! clink!) Will they bleed? I answered her honestly and waited for her to decide she was ready.

Daddy discouraged the whole thing. He's sort of against anything that alters the body. Piercings? Disgusting. Tattoos? Disgusting. Just leave it be, he figures. He told my boys today that if they ever get tattoos he'll spank them, no matter how old. Ha!

We went to the mall a couple days ago and since we were there, I asked if she would like to get her ears pierced. I'd always planned on having a real piercer do them - meaning, a body piercer who knows what they're doing and uses a needle instead of a gun. Then I realized that would mean taking her into a body piercing/tattoo shop, and suddenly that did not seem at all the kind of place I would take my precious little daughter. So the mall it is. Anyway, she said no.

Today I needed to go back to the mall to exchange her swimsuit, and she said she'd like to go with me and get her ears pierced. We talked and talked and talked some more until I was sure she really wanted to. I told Daddy I would only do it if it weren't busy at all and I felt comfortable with the person. His lips looked tight and straight.

We got there and it was empty. No one at all except the girl who was working, and I liked her immediately. I told her Caris would like to get her ears pierced, and she showed us to a tower of earrings used for piercing. We spun them around and around and Caris settled on a pair of tiny gold crosses. They were given the thumbs down by the piercer, who correctly guessed that Caris has sensitive skin. No steel for this little lady, only gold. Caris then decided that tiny silvery gold balls were the ticket. She asked, "Do I have to get earrings?" And even though I wanted to say, "No, of course not!" I said, "yes, you do." Because I knew that her desire for earrings outweighed her temporary nervousness.

She sat in a small black chair and the piercer was so perfect, showing Caris on her hand how the alcohol swab would feel, then the pen to mark the spot. Then it was time. She clicked the first earring in, and of course Caris flinched. Tears came to her eyes - such a slight mist I might not have even noticed, except that I'm her mother. And mothers see these things in their daughters. The piercer showed Caris her beautiful new earring and then quickly completed the set.

There is something about a shared experience with a daughter. My own day of piercing came flooding back. I remember how nervous I was, how proud and grown-up I felt when they were in. How ridiculously scared I was to have them turned the first time. And now here I am, the mother of a 6-year-old girl, old enough to decide that she would like to endure the pain of piercing so that she can wear earrings. It's surreal.

I was so proud of her! I said, "give me five, baby!"and the piercer said, "give me five too! You did so good!" She gave Caris suckers - one for herself and one for each brother. Graham was with us and the two other boys were at home. Graham looked at her wistfully and said, "Now you look like all the other girls."

I realize this post is completely stupid without pictures, but I can't find the memory card for my camera. I'll post pics ASAP. Just take it from me, she looks adorable and so, so happy!


  1. Catching up on your blog tonight, I've missed so much being computerless!

    I remember getting my ears pierced, I cried... I was 17! When I decided to get a second hole in each ear I cried before they even started... I was 18! The stupid things I have let my friends talk me into.
    Then when the bottom hole closed up in each ear (it only takes 24 hours for my ears for some reason) I left it for 18 months before I decided to do something about it but I couldnt bring myself to cry in public again at 27 so I got some ice, antiseptic cream and a sharp point and took care of it myself... STUPID IDEA! Once I fixed one side and realised how much it still hurt, I had to go through with the other.

  2. How sweet. Having daughters is soooo fun.

  3. I remember when my sis and her girlfriend first tried to pierce my ears. To begin, they snapped a clothespin to each of my earlobes. Now, if you think this doesn't hurt...try it! Then, I threw a fit, so the ice cubes came out. Ok. When that dreaded needle came out, I about passed out (the best way to have your ears pierced, cuz you sleep through it). But, for earrings and looking cute and the fun of being a girl, I endured. So glad! And so will Caris be! Yay Caris!